FOMO and Leaving Facebook

facebook-closed

On Christmas Day, I deactivated my Facebook. I’d been thinking about it for a really long time, and on Christmas Day, spurred on by Robert’s escape from Facebook and a feeling of being totally over it, I called Brooke and made her an admin for the litmag page, and then I clicked deactivate.

My utter hatred of Facebook is no secret, but it does make organising uni life much easier. Photos of nights out go up on Facebook, messages of postponed classes are sent via Facebook, and notifications of seminars and events pop up on Facebook. Add to that the hilarious group chat with my blogging babes, and the fact that I’m living in Scotland whilst all of my family and tons of my friends are still in Essex, and it makes it kind of difficult to leave. But, I’m not at uni anymore, so that takes that whole aspect of it away. And you can’t actually delete your Facebook page, only deactivate it. And I’m on Spotify and Goodreads, and I use Facebook to login to them, so technically, I was only actually “deactivated” for about a week. Ha. I’ve logged in a couple of times since Christmas Day, to check in on Severine’s Facebook page and to send congratulations on the birth of a friends baby.

Honestly, I’m not missing it at all. I’m so much happier without it. I’m not frustrated at seeing constant updates of people whining about things that really don’t matter; I don’t have any part in any Facebook dramas; I have to make the effort to actually talk to people I want to interact with. And there’s the important bit, I think. In my experience, Facebook is only capable of the most superficial relationships. It’s too easy to click LIKE on a photo or a status and feel like that counts as maintaining a friendship, that that counts as actual interaction with someone. Then there’s the Fear. Yup, FOMO. Here’s a fact: FOMO is bullshit. It doesn’t actually exist outside of Facebook. Want to know what your friend is up to? Call them. Text them. Email them. Make lunch plans. Make Saturday night party plans. You don’t actually need Facebook. Yes, you’ll have to make more effort, but you should. No Facebook means actually maintaining meaningful relationships with people, and it means that you might have to find out about events and stuff in other places, but it’s not that difficult.

I’m still on Twitter, and Instagram, and I have far more valuable interactions with people in both of those places. I have a hilarious Whataspp group conversation with Dave, Palvashay, Madden, and Francis, which pretty much consists of woke-up-like-dis selfies and pictures of our pets and our dinners. I love them, and that group chat makes me so happy. It’s a genuine way of us all keeping in touch, and sending ridiculous messages when all five of us are in different timezones, dotted about in different countries all over the world.

To steal the summary from Neil Scott’s perfect article, “9 reasons why I am not on Facebook”; Facebook is bad for humans, bad for the web, and the world would be a better place without it.

Bye Facebook, I don’t think I’ll be back.

(image from google search results)

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6 thoughts on “FOMO and Leaving Facebook

  1. Rob says:

    Nice work! Like you, I’ve stumbled upon the odd inconvenience after quitting Facebook, but there’s usually an alternative. Once you’ve got everyone’s email address, for example, you can communicate that way. Email is a more nuanced, “qualitative” way to send messages. Much better.

    Well done on leaving FB. In my experience, there’s not much to miss. Life is better without it.

    • Terri-Jane says:

      Thanks, it really is so much better without it. Email (and Twitter cause I love it) all the way. I’m not even missing stalking my friend’s cousin’s sister’s dog 😉

  2. Safiya says:

    I completely deleted my FB profile a couple of years ago (the last straw was a flat mate sending me info about the gas bill via a FB message). Like you say, I didn’t really find any problems in the sense that if anyone needed to contact me they knew how – if they didn’t I probably didn’t want them contacting me. Then, annoyingly I started working somewhere where they had meetings on Facebook because it was almost possible to get all staff in a room at once.

    Long story, short – I still hate it, barely use it, have like 20 friends on it and am this close to leaving again. Well done for leaving, I hope you aren’t tempted back!

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